1. Reblogged from: simplypotterheads
  2. d-eww:

i think he is my favourite person

    d-eww:

    i think he is my favourite person

    Reblogged from: odins-one-eyed-fuck
  3. jerkpattillo:

ungratefullittleshit:

i’m feeling sick

no no no no

    jerkpattillo:

    ungratefullittleshit:

    i’m feeling sick

    no no no no

    Reblogged from: shakespeares-dracarys
  4. odumb:

an actual screenshot of someone’s actual about page

    odumb:

    an actual screenshot of someone’s actual about page

    Reblogged from: ughsocialjustice
  5. marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:


A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!
Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.
My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”
THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.
THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.
it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.
Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.
On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?
Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:
I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”
Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.
Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.

    marionisamuffin:

    pleasantandcain:

    fromladytolifter:

    candidlycara:

    dance-in-the-shadows:

    gracediamondsfear:

    wifeyknowsbest:

    whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:

    A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!

    Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

    this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

    i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

    God.

    My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”

    THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.

    THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.

    it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

    For that last comment.

    I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.

    Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.

    On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

    Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?

    Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

    Story time:

    I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”

    Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.

    Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

    It got better.

    Reblogged from: everywordinexistence
  6. tmntyler:

mormondad:

This is how I stayed alive my senior year

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks of time like this.

    tmntyler:

    mormondad:

    This is how I stayed alive my senior year

    I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks of time like this.

    Reblogged from: epic-humor
  7. october31st1981:

    Real talk there are some people that say if James Potter wasn’t a Gryffindor he’d be a Slytherin because he was clever and determined but let’s be real if we strip away that layer of daring, nerve and chivalry that boy is Hufflepuff all over

    Reblogged from: thatlilqt
  8. davesproot:

cobrastein:

ghostlycoos:

RELEASE THE PIGEONS

the person that goes running after them omfg

"Archimedes, no!"

    davesproot:

    cobrastein:

    ghostlycoos:

    RELEASE THE PIGEONS

    the person that goes running after them omfg

    "Archimedes, no!"

    Reblogged from: bonerpie
  9. slimgoodymakeba:

chocolategoddessss:

howtobeterrell:

titspirationall:

lynnpls:


Where’d the name Iggy Azalea come from?
Iggy is the name of my old dog. I had a name plate necklace that I used to wear which read “Iggy.” People I’d meet assumed it was my name and started calling me that. Azalea is the street I grew up on – I’m from Azalea Street. My family still lives there to this day. (x)


#LITERAL#SALTINE#CRACKER


AM CRYING






SO FANCY.

Basic

This. Simple. Bitch.

That formula was also used to determine your porn star name.


I’d be Jack Honeysuckle. I can see that working for porn but not rapping

    slimgoodymakeba:

    chocolategoddessss:

    howtobeterrell:

    titspirationall:

    lynnpls:

    Where’d the name Iggy Azalea come from?

    Iggy is the name of my old dog. I had a name plate necklace that I used to wear which read “Iggy.” People I’d meet assumed it was my name and started calling me that. Azalea is the street I grew up on – I’m from Azalea Street. My family still lives there to this day. (x)

    SO FANCY.

    Basic

    This. Simple. Bitch.

    That formula was also used to determine your porn star name.

    I’d be Jack Honeysuckle. I can see that working for porn but not rapping

    Reblogged from: andrewthecoolone
  10. devonbanks:

this is still my favorite tweet of all time

    devonbanks:

    this is still my favorite tweet of all time

    Reblogged from: andrewthecoolone
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